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MOVIEPIQ · RELATIONAL MOMENTS

Films for When You Love Someone Who Cannot Love Themselves

These films were chosen by the Moviepiq editorial team for when loving someone who doesnt love themselves. No forced resolution. These films sit with the feeling rather than rush past it.

Films for when you love someone who deflects it, minimizes it, or disappears exactly when you get close.

You need your hands full. That is all. You need something that takes up the right amount of space in your attention, that keeps the quieter frequency from surfacing, that gives you somewhere to be that isn't inside the thing you are working around. These films are designed for exactly this kind of watching: present enough to hold you, undemanding enough to let you rest inside the story without having to perform your engagement. They will do the work. You just have to stay in the room.

The Father movie poster
1
2020 · 97min · ★★★★☆ 8.2/10

A man refuses all assistance from his daughter as he ages and, as he tries to make sense of his changing circumstances, he begins to doubt his loved ones, his own mind and even the fabric of his reality.

It holds your attention at exactly the right level. Demanding enough that the loop cannot find a foothold, generous enough that it does not feel like work.

Full hands, quiet mind

CODA movie poster
2
2021 · 112min · ★★★★☆ 7.9/10

As a CODA (Child of Deaf Adults), Ruby is the only hearing person in her deaf family. When the family's fishing business is threatened, Ruby finds herself torn between pursuing her love of music and her fear of abandoning her parents.

Full enough to keep the front of your brain occupied. The thing you are working around will still be there later, but later is not now.

Keeps the front occupied

The Longest Ride movie poster
3
2015 · 128min · ★★★★☆ 8.1/10

The lives of a young couple intertwine with a much older man as he reflects back on a lost love while he's trapped in an automobile crash.

The right kind of busy. This film puts something in your hands and keeps it there until you are ready to set it down.

Right level of demanding

Close to the Horizon movie poster
4
2019 · 117min · ★★★☆☆ 6.4/10

Jessica knows exactly what her life is supposed to look like and where it takes her. But then she meets Danny. He has a complicated past and could confuse all their plans. Jessica has to decide.

Exactly what distraction is supposed to be: a world complete enough to be in, undemanding enough to rest inside.

The bridge

Full enough to keep the loop from finding you. Just.

Logan movie poster
5
2017 · 137min · ★★★☆☆ 6.9/10

In the near future, a weary Logan cares for an ailing Professor X in a hideout on the Mexican border. But Logan's attempts to hide from the world and his legacy are upended when a young mutant arrives, pursued by dark forces.

It holds your attention at exactly the right level. Demanding enough that the loop cannot find a foothold, generous enough that it does not feel like work.

Full hands, quiet mind

My Life as a Zucchini movie poster
6
2016 · 66min · ★★★★☆ 7.5/10

After his mother’s death, Zucchini is befriended by a kind police officer, Raymond, who accompanies him to his new foster home filled with other orphans his age. There, with the help of his newfound friends, Zucchini eventually learns to trust and love as he searches for a new fa

Full enough to keep the front of your brain occupied. The thing you are working around will still be there later, but later is not now.

Keeps the front occupied

The Invisible Guest movie poster
7
2017 · 107min · ★★★☆☆ 6.9/10

Barcelona, Spain. Adrián Doria, a young and successful businessman accused of murder, meets one night with Virginia Goodman, an expert interrogation lawyer, in order to devise a defense strategy.

The right kind of busy. This film puts something in your hands and keeps it there until you are ready to set it down.

Right level of demanding

Gabriel's Inferno movie poster
8
2020 · 122min · ★★★★☆ 8.2/10

An intriguing and sinful exploration of seduction, forbidden love, and redemption, Gabriel's Inferno is a captivating and wildly passionate tale of one man's escape from his own personal hell as he tries to earn the impossible--forgiveness and love.

Exactly what distraction is supposed to be: a world complete enough to be in, undemanding enough to rest inside.

The bridge

David Attenborough: A Life on Our Planet movie poster
9
2020 · 83min · ★★★★☆ 7.7/10

The story of life on our planet by the man who has seen more of the natural world than any other. In more than 90 years, Attenborough has visited every continent on the globe, exploring the wild places of our planet and documenting the living world in all its variety and wonder.

It holds your attention at exactly the right level. Demanding enough that the loop cannot find a foothold, generous enough that it does not feel like work.

Full hands, quiet mind

Oppenheimer movie poster
10
2023 · 181min · ★★★★☆ 7.8/10

The story of J. Robert Oppenheimer's role in the development of the atomic bomb during World War II.

Full enough to keep the front of your brain occupied. The thing you are working around will still be there later, but later is not now.

Keeps the front occupied

Dogman movie poster
11
2023 · 115min · ★★★★☆ 8.3/10

A boy, bruised by life, finds his salvation through the love of his dogs.

The right kind of busy. This film puts something in your hands and keeps it there until you are ready to set it down.

Right level of demanding

Maudie movie poster
12
2016 · 115min · ★★★★☆ 8.2/10

Canadian folk artist Maud Lewis falls in love with a fishmonger while working for him as a live-in housekeeper.

Exactly what distraction is supposed to be: a world complete enough to be in, undemanding enough to rest inside.

The bridge

Hands full, head somewhere else. That's the whole goal.

From the Blog

READ Movies to Watch When Lonely
READ Movies When You Just Got Dumped
READ Movies When You Miss Someone

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